I was only fifteen years old when I met the person responsible for a lifetime of hurt.
It was in my 5th hour spanish class at high school when he approached me. I thought that he was good looking and best yet he was a senior, at the time I didn't think much of our conversation he was very brief and I thought he was a nice guy. He called me one night and wanted to go hang out, I thougth it sounded like fun and decided to go but only if we went in a large group. That's all it took. We began dating regularly, being young it didn't take much for me to fall in "love" with him, he bought me a promise ring and I thought I had it made. He fooled everyone, he put on an act that he was such a wonderful guy, nobody could see past it except for two of my siblings, but whenever they tried to warn me I refused to listen, I will always regret not listening to them.
My boyfriend's parents were going to spend a weekend camping up by a lake, so they invited me and I accepted. I slept in a tent with his sister and he slept in another tent with his brother. One morning I got up and went over by the lake, his brother and sister were already out playing on the beach, I wanted to go join them but I wanted to go get my boyfriend up first.
I crawled in his tent, he was still asleep so I went and laid my head down by his waiting for him to wake up, after about five minutes he woke up and stretched. He leaned over and gave me a kiss, I told him to get up and go swimming with me. He kept touching and kissing me and laid me down, I felt uncomfortable I tried sitting up but he wouldn't let me, then I tried scooting back he then grabbed my hips and pull me towards him.
He had a hold of the bottoms my swimsuit and stretched them to the side so I was exposed. I kept telling him no and tried to get away but he continued to penatrate me. He finally got tired of fighting with me and let me go.
When I confronted him about what happened he said that I wanted it, and it was my fault.
I didn't go forth with it until a year later, beacause I let him convince me that it was my fault.
It will be three years in July since I was raped. I am slowly healing but I know the memories will always stay with me. All I can do now is live and heal. *Hope*
When I was fifteen years old, it all started. I don't have many memories from before then but the ones I do have I will share.
At fifteen years old, I was being molested by my dad's best friend. It went on for three months and I couldn't tell anyone. He made me do a lot of things and messed with my head. I had known him since I was seven so I had trusted him. After that happened, I noticed my mom drinking more and more. My whole family blamed the drinking on me b/c of my moods from being molested...I still hadn't told them though..Anyway,after that I got into a two year relationship with a guy it got to the point where he raped me all the time. I just sat there like a dead person letting him get his kicks. I finally broke up with him and had a party to celebrate...
The party was great! I was drinking a lot and smoking and having a great time. My friend D*** kept giving my friend and I drinks. Well, soon I wasn't feeling so hot..He took me down to my room and tried to rape me. I pushed him off and I passed out. Later on in that night, I walked in my brother's bedroom to see how my other friend was b/c she had passed out to. I walked in on my friend D*** raping her. I yelled and screamed and told him to go to hell. The next morning the police were looking for him and found him dead. He committed suicide by jumping off a bridge down the street from my house. I took in so much guilt and shame wishing that he had only raped me instead of my friend b/c I had been through it before.
When I was a sophomore in college, I studied in Seville, Spain b/c I was a business/spanish major. I had been traveling Europe by myself for two weeks and when I got back to the city I lived in I had met a girl who knew two guys. That night we went out and I can't even remember how many bars I went to. The next thing I knew, this guy was on top of me raping me in a hotel room. Again, I laid there like I was dead. I didn't even know who he was or if he wore a condom. He did other things to me too. So, then I came home to the US, and didn't tell anyone.
Six years had past until I told my parent's about the molestation. I was so utterly scared to tell them but it was the best thing I could have done. They had known about the rape b/c some doctor broke confidentiality.
My trust with people have been extremely difficult but I have gotten a lot better and now I am counseling people who have been through this same type of thing. I am so happy to be helping people and to be able to understand what they are going through. If I could, I would help every single person who has ever been hurt. I don't like to see people in pain. It hurts me to see people in pain, I guess that's why I like helping.
My story starts when I was 2 or 3 years old. My uncle who lived with us molested meI had no idea that it was wrong. He did this every morning when my grandparents were asleep. When I was 5 I stopped it by pushing my uncle off of me. I then ran and told my grandparents. The cops took him away and my grandparents and I followed them to the hospital and thats when I got checked out. Thats where I then found out I have scars in me. I went to counsiling off and on since then. I have had flash backs since then. And ever since then I have been afraid of the dark and afraid that someone is in my room. So thats what happened to me.