HI all,
Ok after trying numerous other groups where I was booted for simply being a man I have come back here. Yes its true. I was abused yet again. This is for MEN yet you have a woman on board. It doesn't upset any men here, so why the hell can't we all just agree that abuse is abuse regardless of gender. To me by ousting me from their groups they were saying that I was an abuser. That because of my gender that I posed a risk to others.
Trigger
Picture a boy of only 4 years old. Picture him being raped by a female and being confused. This was me. This was a babysitter. She had the look in her eyes. The look that all perps get. Statistically she should of been a one off. Because if society would have you believe what they want you too, its very rare that females abuse children. They would like you to believe that women just don't have it in them.
Picture being told over and over again that you are useless and mental and that if you were there child they would of had you aborted at birth. That is what happened to me.
Due to Aspergers Syndrome, a mild autistic problem. I was labeled a retard and sent to a psychiatric clinic where people were MEANT to help Children. Instead one woman used to abuse me on a daily basis. But wait I hear you cry, you must be lying, because statistically those are the odds of winning the lottery, that 2 women could of abused the same child. Well its true. The fact of the matter is I was easy to abuse. Because I hardly spoke to many anyway as I was a shy child. I already had been diagnosed as having behavioral problems etc, so who would of believed me.
She used to find excuses to humilate me and for me to be naughty. She would practice pin down. That was standard practice then. They dragged a child to an isolated room and would pin them down if they had a tantrum. But she didn't practice it in that way. She would sit on my shoulders hold my head then get ontop. I am angry at the moment so all this is going through me now. It all happened. I was not lucky I was 7 at the time and wanted to die.
SOME PEOPLE say why didn't I talk. Well I saw a child thrown up in the air like a rag doll and his head hit the cocreate. Anyway I was halled into the office and called a liar, by guess who, yep my Perp. She called me a liar and a wicked child.
On top of that the last picture was of an older girl using her brother. Well this was when my mom adopted my Sister Katey who at that time she didn't know had been sexually abused by her natural parents and through foster homes.
She started to abuse me from the age of 4 up till when I was 12. She was 5 years older but much older for her age. Whatever her age she used me and was quite old when it stopped.
I have found pervy psychiatrists wanting me to tell them every details. These were mostly MEN. So you see any ladies here I have experienced nasty stuff at the hands of men as well.
I was getting help from a local Mental Health Unit but I don't think they feel I am a big risk. SO they haven't done anything since. I am going to have to chase them up. The problem is I have coped so long, that its like I come over as if there are no problems. Well they are. Just because I am a MAN and just because the abusers were WOMEN shouldn't make any difference.
Anyway that is my introduction back again.
By the way I am in the UK
Stephen
icq: 45589107
im: Chemer27
I was 12 years old when my stepfather raped me. He had been abusive to my mother and came in my room one night. He told me that if i made him happy he wouldnt hit my mom i refused but he is much bigger than me. The next day i got smashed. i came home and his punishment was raping me again. He had me do things to him that 12 year olds shouldnt know about. this went on until i was13. i met a boy who made me tell my mom. she didnt believe me and made me apologize to my stepfather. when i was 14 i got pregnant by this boy and my stepfather was insanely jealous. he hit my stomach trying to make me miscarry and accused me of cheating on him. I cant get over what happened. He constantly raped me for almost 3 years. i now live with my daughter and my father, my daughters father isnt around anymore. i can't sleep at night and i have horrible nightmares. i can still feel him touch me.
I would like to start by telling everyone that Im only the secondary victim. My wife was raped, while i was away in korea. The story is a little sketchy simple because like so many of you she has block out most it.
It was never a doubt for me not to stand by my wife. I truely love her, and would never wanted to lose her. In one of our counseling session the counseler pointed out to me that i should become a little bit of and expert on the subject matter. Thats when i found this site.
Thanks to everyone you for your courage and understanding. In this site with your stories, I have been given to opportunity to truly understand what my wife is going threw. For everyone person who has posted a story i would like to say that you are some of the strongest people i have truely meet. I would like to let you know that not everything is bad, and your help with my marriage has been the best thing every for me.
Good luck and stay strong you will prevail.
Name Withheld
