First I want to start off by saying that if you know somebody who doesn't want a boyfriend that DOES NOT mean that they can't get a boyfriend.
Ok in the summer of 98 i went on vacation and one day I was raped. It was horrible, the worst experience of my life.
Well afterwards I got distant from my friends, well not really distant I just didn't hang out much after school. I'm too scared to go out. I also don't want a boyfriend. I just don't trust guys.The guys where I live are all after sex and stuff so I'm too scared. But sometimes i get asked why I don't have a boyfriend, I just say I don't want one. But thats my story.
I am 14 yrs. old and this happened a few months ago and i still feel dirty and get upset about it, like anyone would if this happened to them. It all started when I made the incredibly stupid decision to meet a 16 yr. old guy from the internet at my school. I should've known he would do something because we had been talking on the phone for like 2 weeks and every time we would talk about sex and say he wanted to have sex with me and I would just say I didn't want to because I didn't know hium and I wanted to wait until I was married and if we could please change the subject. He said okay and if I told him to stop that he wouldn't even come near me, well that never happened.
When we met at my school he immediately started having his hands all over me and I didn't say anything because I didn't want to seem stupid to him like I couldn't handle it or anything. We eventually walked to this park that was nearby and it was just at the end of my court where I live too, I'll never look at that park the same way again. Anyways, we were sitting on the grass and then he leaned over and asked me to kiss him with lots of tongue and I didn't want to because it would be my first kiss and I wanted it to be with someone that I cared about and I had feelings for, but again I said nothing because I was nervous and scared and I did what he asked. He then started pushing me down so I was laying on my back and he climbed on top of me and that's when I knew I had to speak up because I knew I deserved better than this. So I told him no and to get the hell off of me but he didn't listen and he said he was going to "get what he wanted." He held my hands down and threatened to beat the shit out of me if I tried anything so I just froze. He ripped my jeans off and started fingering me and then he proceeded to taking off my shirt and touching me everywhere. I couldn't bear it so I just closed my eyes and started crying and trying to think about anything but the pain, by now he was fully inside me. All of a sudden I got this huge surge of energy and anger all in one and I just hit him with my fists and started kicking and, after years of pretty much being trained to fight and wrestly thanks to my older brother, I was able to get him off of me. He then grabbed me as I was standing up and he said that he loved me and only did it because I was beautiful and deserved to be loved by someone and feel pleasure, that was complete bullshit. I elbowed him in the face and the groin and ran home still crying. I ran right past the living room where my brother was, my parents weren't home yet, and into my room where I stayed the rest of the night just crying and listening to my music.
I still see his ugly face in my nightmares and I wish I had said or done something earlier to stop him. Not only did he take away my virginity but he took away my trust in all men and that really effects me today. I have only told a few people and I don't plan on telling anymore than that because I want to just forget about it. I'm telling you all who are reading this to never meet someone off the internet no matter how much you think you know them or trust and them, DON'T!!! Please!!! Don't even take the chance because it's not worth it at all. I know it will take a long time for me to get over this but I know I will because I am strong and I have self-respect and this bastard will get what he deserves one day. I should've spoke up but I didn't and that cost me dearly so don't ever let that happen to any of you.
I have heard that when a woman is raped, it is not her fault, in this case it truly is my fault. I should've have never met him and I should've done something earlier because that coould've prevented this whole thing from happening, but I didn't and I paid the price. Please don't let the same thing happen to you! Thank you for listening to my story.
I was going out with a guy named Chris, we'd been going out off and on for about two years. everytime I broke up with him it was because of his obsession with sex. I had told him several times that I wasn't ready, and he said he understood. But one night, I was 13 he was 15, we were making out in the RV out behind his house, and it started to go to far. When I said "No!" he hit me and put his hand over my mouth. I tryed my best to get away but he was to strong, and he raped me.
When he was finished he told me if I told ANYONE he would "put mary through the same pain." Mary was and still is my best-friend, so naturally I trust her. One night we were watching a show on lifetime about rape and I just busted down, and I told her. About a week later he raped her and his friend that was with him made me watch.
I'm 14 now (one year after the rape) I feel that it is my fault her life was ruined because I wasn't strong enough to hold my pain in.
Well thats my story thanks for listening.